Friday, August 28, 2009

Spiritualizes Matter

The sun spiritualizes matter, the moon materializes spirit. Or said another way:
The sun perceives matter as spirit, the moon perceives spirit as matter.

Dave says that explains the whole mystery of the universe.

I hope I live long enough to contemplate this until I understand it!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Ravens, Wolves and rainbows

I am sitting in a circle of light, breathing into the inner radiance of my Presence. In and out, staying focused as best I can. Feeling a deep inner peace and subtle sense of joy. Ahhh... that's what it is all about. That aliveness, still and joyful, not attached to thinking.

As soon as that thought crosses my mind - poof. I'm back. What a rascal the mind is. Like a 7 year old child playing games, trying to regain control of every moment. If you let it, it drives you insane. Not a friendly 7 year old at that. How old was that kid in the Omen? The runaway train of the mind needs release. Needs to be released, set free. Or we go crazy.

The most beautiful image arises, as I sink back down into that radiant Presence. My thoughts are ravens. I can see them, they are big blue black ravens, flying around the top of my head. I watch them form patterns in the sky, it is mesmerizing in its own right. They are attached to me though, by strings of light, wire, DNA? Hard to tell. The strings are connected to the back of head, where my skull meets my neck. I look up, the birds are loud. The craziness of our thoughts is the insanity of compulsive thinking, distracting us from the present moment. Drowning out the stillness. If I let it.

I take a scissor, in my minds eye I can see it so clearly, and cut the strings that bind them to me. Oh my goodness, how easy is it to find relief from thought. The courage to cut the strings that bind us. I watch the ravens, my embodied thoughts fly freely above me, no longer attached to my body. It is interesting that they do not leave, they are there still, ever flying back and forth. But I no longer hear them screeching. The insanity of constant thinking, a cacophony of flocks of ravens raucously calling out my thoughts over and over - had stopped. I watch them. I observe them, but I am not them. I become witness to their patterns. And it is peaceful.

The stillness that surrounds the watcher, is me. A deep sense of peace pervades this realization. Part of me watches, part of me disembodies and flies up to join the ravens. The sky splits open, and I find myself riding through the sky. The image shifts so quickly, and I ride through a ripple in the veil.

I am now on the back of a white wolf, like riding horseback with out a saddle. Not that I would know, being a city girl, but the image is there - real as the nose on my face. Riding bareback on a white wolf. Following the trail of the ravens as they fly. It reminds that all the creatures of myth, all dreams and spirits live in between the spaces in our minds. Current time, past time and future time all coexist in the moment as the scene turns into a rainbow pervading all of space. I watch. I am.

Am still, the witness to my being. I like the quiet best of all. And the inner joy. Nothing is real except for the stillness.

But I like the cosmic scissor idea - have to see if that can be patented. Imagine, going crazy worrying - here just cut the ties that bind you. Can't stop obsessing over that lost love affair? Here, cut the ties that bind you. Can't stop............but you can, just takes a snip. A raven, a wolf, a rainbow, and a scissor. What else do you need?

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Compassion for Self is a Life's Work

I have started meditating again, first thing in the morning before getting dressed for work. The Tibetan incense burns slowly, filling the meditation room with a heavy scent. I love it. I love these rituals. Like a warm bath with lavender, it soothes my mind and calms my spirit.

It's very quiet in my house in the early morning. Alone. Quiet. I have a cup of iced oat straw tea and sit. I love these times. My spirit needs a certain amount of alone time to feel replenished.

This morning I ask for help, for guidance. I watch my breathe, in and out. Allow my state of consciousness to deepen. The message I receive was very beautiful, and timely - as are all of the gifts we receive in meditation. In my minds eye, I see an image of Yogananda, whose lessons on Self Realization I have been reading. He takes my hands in his, smiles. I sense his message "we are all children of the universe. We are all part of the divine plan. Allow karma to unfold as is written. Let go of the mind, the guilt, the rationals for everything. All is as it is, as it should be, as it will be. The law is love, and unfolds as it unfolds. Let go into the law, and relax. " He reminds me of the truth of the universe. I find it very reassuring.

We can all drive ourselves crazy with constant thoughts, going one way, then another, back and forth, as if the concerns of the ego mattered in reality. The pull of the past or the pull of the future, both consist of old habits, thought patterns of memory. Dave and I were just discussing this over the weekend, the vibration of memory and the distortions we cling to.

This morning I could see my worries, my thoughts, my lifetimes float by, above my head like clouds. Different personas and personalities, passing over time. I felt none were the real me, all just interpretations of the real within me. Nothing was held, in that moment everything floating freely. What a inner ahhhhh, such lasting wisdom.

I am reminded that compassion for ourselves, is a good place to start the day.

Getting back to this post, now early evening - am reminded that compassion for self is a life's work.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Infinite Tenderness

Dave gave me the second chapter of the new book he is working on to read and give him feedback. The chapter "The Divine Plan", is about 20 pages, and I sat yesterday at Broadway and 23rd street, under a blue umbrella, in the glorious shade reading - mesmerized.

I was so moved by much of it, but this particular passage especially. I read it again this morning. Towards the bottom of the first page he asks:

"Do we sense that the universe in some mysterious way, follows an immutable process to fulfill its own purpose and destiny?

Is it possible infinite reality has its basis in Law, yet infinite tenderness holds it together?"

Infinite tenderness. What an amazing idea. Could it be? When our minds relax enough, and our I AM, the inner knowing self that is our true self, radiates its calm throughout our entire being, there is a feeling of infinite tenderness. Infinite tenderness. I say the phrase to myself over and over, and somehow, I feel my inner awareness more clearly. I relax. Like the wisdom and mystery of following our breathing, the knowledge of law and tenderness as constants is a spiritual touchstone.

We are all so battered by life, at different times there is so much suffering, other times so much joy, and the mind grasps at straws to keep it all together. Dave reminds me, that the key is to get beyond the mind, which is where meditation is our guide. The guide into realization. So that our knowing is not of thought or believing in something, but of inner intuitive understanding.

There are times I am there, and other times, I fall short. And it is my belief system, my thoughts about an idea that loom larger than life. So, I close my eyes and breathe. The larger reality of our being, and our presence here on the earth plane is rooted in that breathe. As the sages say " we enter Zen from there". The yearning then for the Great Mother, or Great Father, The Absolute, is perhaps simply the yearning for the infinite tenderness that holds the Law together, with the heart of Law and the Universe as it is. All is as it is, all is as it should be. My breathe will lead me into this innate understanding, when I forget, I must remember to breathe. We are part of a greater plan.

Ah, to be human.

I, like most have a long way to go in my meditation process, my path of realization. But then, that's part of the Divine Plan.

And when in doubt, I'll ask Dave!

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Relaxing into Contact

This morning Dave and I walked along the Hoboken waterfront. I take the Path train to SVA, he buys the paper, we kiss and go on our way. It's a lovely morning ritual. Many mornings Dave talks about life and spirit. Today he talked about the concept of being Present in a way that I found so moving. He called it Relaxing into Contact.

The image that arises for me is of the mind becoming a shining pool of liquid silver, consciousness flowing down the body to the "souls" of the feet. Relaxing with each step, breathing. Allowing the mind, and the jumble of thoughts that race around constantly, to relax, spread out, and slowly become liquid. Ahhh, so peaceful.

I have practiced watching the breathe for many years, and still I forget it is the key. In and out of this presence within, I become more aware of Now, the moment. The awareness of my true being watches then my personality self, my mind relax. Fascinating process. I am grateful for the morning reminders of what makes life LIFE.

Don't let your mind take you into stressful places - bring your focus back to the breath. Relax into every contact, every moment. Relax into the moment, into contact with the moment.

Observe your feelings, and smile. So that right now, all there is, is the smile. Feel that radiate through your body. Liquid consciousness, peace of mind, ahhhh.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

Let no day pass, without commenting on goodness

Sunday evening. A relaxing afternoon. Reading a great mystery, family is home and all is well. I'm grateful for little things.

I like to remember to live in the moment, as much as I can, in the NOW. There is always something good floating around to note, and feel, and breathe into. Maybe its a cool breeze in the humid summer evening, or the look in my cats eye when he gazes out the window at the squirrels that makes me smile. Tonight its watching DA play Doom on the xbox 360. E is playing WOW on the PC.

I bought a video game yesterday for myself, a game called OKAMI for the Wii - and have oficially started my life as gamer. I started playing this morning. In the game, I'm a white wolf spirit embodying the great mother Ameratsu in her quest to bring light to the dark filled worlds. What a hoot. That's the story line. Picture perfect.

I'm grateful for goodness and the wisdom brought to my consciousness through many forms. Watch for omens, and repeating metaphors. The universe talks to us through symbols. And perhaps, through video games too.